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09:37 am
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things & things
dude the weather in oakland has been crazy. wake up and its cold outside but the sun is shining. go to work and when i come outside it's practically flooding. and i think in some places its been snowing? it cant snow here!! i dont know how to ride my bike in the snow, man. anyway been taking the bus far far down the street and going to the doctor once a week, keeping my head in check and things. and that's a goooood thing for me. work is draining, but it's alleviated when i think about all the things i'll do once i clock out. been hanging out more getting out more and everything. and i joined ymca and ive been running all over the place, all while running in place, and its great. more later, gaters.
Current Mood:  relaxed
Current Music: fear
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01:26 pm
[Link] | school started again. im taking creative writing, u.s. history, and band. im going down to 4 days a week at work. im living with svet and maree and ive got a big room and a bookshelf. its getting easier to get going and keep moving.
Current Mood:  full
Current Music: witchcraft
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12:31 pm
[Link] | i work at whole foods now ive been working ther like a month. its pretty cool it takes up most of my time though. im moving in with maree in january and that is great! i have a lot of homework to do in the next few weeks. im glad im in school though and im glad im finally feeling better. even if i sometimes feel bad its a better bad not a bottomless bad.
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06:01 pm
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speed it up or slow it down
i missed another show because right before i left i got that weird feeling i always get right before i get going. so andrew left without me and im sitting at home reading and watching the hours melt away like all the other days. everything is moving and happening but i feel stuck here in this one spot and i feel like i cant move at all. it feels like im watching everyone having a huge party right in front of me and everyone says, "why dont you just party with us?" and i dont knowww why but i just cant man...
Current Mood: hopeless
Current Music: witchcraft
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11:36 am
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yayy
andrew got back from tour for a few days and hes leaving in a few hours to go on tour in europe for another month. dang man that is intense. it was awesome to hang out for a few days though. i'll miss him but it's summer and i dont have to go back to work for another week and my tonsil stuff is almost healed and im gonna eat some pizza and then see chloe!!! heck ya.
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10:48 am
[Link] | duuude. ive been at my moms house for the last few days just knitting and sitting and sleeping and not really eating. i was gonna go back to oakland today but maybe ill stay here a little bit longer. anyway when i come home i think im gonna take greyhound to san joseeeee. yaaaaaa.. or maybe visit sarah jane in prunedale..
love cassie
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08:56 am
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tonsils
my tonsils are out! the hospital was weird. i had to wear a huge hospital gown and the operating room was huge with all these machines and one bed. i can't swallow like at all. its crazy how quickly you can get sick of soy yogurt and icecream, even if theyre usually like the best foods ever. i just hope i can get better as soon as possible. man!
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09:13 am
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man.
im about to go get my tonsils taken out. i dont feel that nervous but i have been trying not to think about needles and tubes and stuff like that. andrew called me this morning from boston. it was awesome! he's coming back in nine days for a little while before he has to leave one more time for a month. duuuuuuuuuude. i am gonna eat like so much icecream.
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10:13 am
[Link] | yesterday me and pat hung out and made a pizza that tasted a lot like the lanesplitters pizza. then we went to a dog birthday party in the city!! it was for our friend sarah's dog blue. blue turned 2. the dogs were wearing cowboy hats and eating fancy dog biscuits shaped like hamburgers and donuts and firehydrants. you could tell they were really stoked. there were balloons and ribbons all around. it was a really great dog party. so now im gonna go get a muffin and some coffee.
love cassie
Current Mood:  good
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01:46 am
[Link] | hung out at my moms and did laundry. drove her car around and bought groceries. me and svet drove to san jose cause hostile takeover and godstomper were playing. and lances band and case of emergency. it was nice to go there after so long. im glad we went and i havent felt bummed in days.
Current Music: failure face
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08:43 pm
[Link] | its really hot outside and makes your butt sweaty and gross. me and andrew ate a lot of spinach for dinner and now hes packing up his stuff. hes leaving for two months for tour. hes coming back after a month but for less than a day. i dont know how i feel about it. i guess thats partly why i feel so sad and get bummed out and weirdy all the time lately and i wish it was the only reason but i know its not. but i dont really know! like whats going on. i think i just need to be excited about summer and life instead of hiding in my room and thinking about my tonsils.
Current Mood:  lethargic
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02:07 am
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better.
i feel sorda better than ive been feeling. i got to go swimming and then walk around behind the freeway and got a new couch for me and svets living room and hung out with the cat and i got 3 days in a row off work and visited my mom and hung out with my brother and borrowed my moms car and drove around with andrew all day and did errands and ate a muffin. and lots of other stuff that was pretty cool too.
Current Mood: pleased
Current Music: X
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02:10 am
[Link] | it seems like for a long time now i dont enjoy doing lots of the things i used to do. i dont feel like working in the store at gilman when i have to wake up a few hours later for work or i dont even like any of the bands playing. i dont like drinking or hanging around with a bunch of people who are wasted. i can hardly stay up late anymore cause im always waking up at 4:55 for work. the most exciting thing i have planned for summer is getting my tonsils out. i feel more content in my room listening to records and reading than outside playing. i dont know when things got this way. when excitement made me uneasy. when nothing seems that exciting anymore anyway.
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08:36 pm
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float on
today was a really great day man. i had class but no work. me and andrew went to peets and drank coffee. i ate a peach. we walked around in some bookstores and ate some food. we got our pennies smooshed by a train. we rode our bikes a lot. i saw my friend moses and i went into some bakery/coffee shop that i really wanted to work at. and i emailed them too. and they said i needed a resume but then they called me and asked me to come work tomorrow! its a full time job and its a bran new bakery started by two lady bakers. im working weekend days but not too early and not too late and if i can do something i really like then who cares anyway. im stoked about life though.
love cassie
Current Mood: full
Current Music: antidote
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12:35 pm
[Link] | its like 12:30 i just got off work a little while ago. my arms really hurt from steaming milk and carrying crates of milk and lifting coffee grounds and milk milk milk which feels like its deteriorating the bones in my wrists even though its supposed to give you strong bones or something. im sick sick sick of working in a coffee shop in the same little spot all day all weekend early weekend every weekend never get to hang out with my friends. dude id rather work all week 9-5 than when everyone else is out playing but i gotta stay home and sleep. but like man, its no big deal, cause i will just get a new job and it will be pretty cool maybe.
Current Mood:  tired
Current Music: cro-mags
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10:57 am
[Link] | fuck strep throat. this is week two and my glands are about the size of lemons. i love lemons but in my mouth not my neck!! not like this! i was sitting in the car with my stepmom and stepbrother on the way to my dads house yesterday and then tony came on the radio and sang a song about freeing the animals from the zoo, but none of them wanted to leave. i said "aw you guys you planned all this, really you shouldnt have" how cute.
Current Mood:  sick
Current Music: nirvana
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11:53 pm
[Link] | man so i finally went to the doctor today and got some penacillin. cause i think i had strept throat but i think its getting better. also i loaded a bunch of my stuff into my moms car and im gonna take it to me and svets new house in the morning. then were gonna go get paint and stuff and then later i have orientation for my new job. the place isnt open yet so i am not the only new perosn there everyone is. also i dont think im gonna go back to school next semester. cause school sucks but everything else is pretty cool. im gonna work at the cafe bakery and work at mrr a lot and get more tattoos. and stay up really late and hang out with opie a lot. also figure out relationships. maybe write more. maybe try to play trombone again but probly not man.
Current Music: weezer
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12:29 am
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fucked up
man. me and opie bougjht grunge tapes then i took a long nap. pat woke me up and we walked to dead rat and bought two maddogs. got druuunk. these rad kids came and we lit fireworks in the fog and listened to the ramones then we drove to andrews an we all drove to the rad ids house. but then like stuff got bad mannn they didnt like our graffiti and they were disrespectful to the grff man so they got what was coming to them then tried tried to stab us with a sword but just peed on andrews car. we all almost beeat them up. fucking douchebags. except the cool kids who lived there. now im safe at home at andrews. phew.
Current Mood:  bouncy
Current Music: american steel
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02:12 pm
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eating refried beans
yesterday was insane. i found out me and svet are getting the lease to an apartment. i found out i might get a new job. i ditched class and my final. i drank a lot and gave opie and pat some royal tattooos. me and andrew have to talk about some stuff tonight. it really feels shitty when he has never done anything shitty to me and i feel like i am always the one making everything all difficult. i dont want to
Current Mood: sick/
Current Music: wipers
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06:01 pm
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litany
ive been putting off this one research paper for this one class for this whole semester and now it comes down to this one day that is today the day before our presentations are due and then that one week (next week) when we gotta turn our papers in. in one minute of maybe a few of them i will go and work on that. lifes a stressball at least andrew helps me out a lot from going crazy.
Current Mood:  nervous
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cassbat's journal